Day 71 - Universal...Part Deux

Author – Grant
Based In – Orland, Florida
Specifically – Universal Studios

Today’s Photos – http://www.flickr.com/photos/32017704@N03/sets/72157612658703920/

Final day in Orlando today so it’s back on the theme park routine. Today’s park of choice was Universal’s other offering (following our visit to the ride orientated Island of Adventure earlier in the week) is their Studios park which is more film and TV inspired. Whilst I couldn’t have told you before our visit, it turns out that Universal are responsible for a decent percentage of the more popular TV programs out there including The Simpsons, Fear Factor, Men In Black, The Mummy films, Shrek, everything on Nicklodeon and much much more.

Now I mistakenly thought that the studios park might have been some insight into movie making but actually it was just another bunch of rides inspired by those movies. Not that I am complaining – learning is over-rated anyhow. Sometimes the link between the program/film and the ride was based on a solid foundation (such as the Men In Black ride which involved clearing up the streets of Manhattan with a laser gun) whilst other times the link was tentative at best (such as The Simpsons ride where a huge story was set in place for a glorified roller-coaster simulator). The Disaster experience was a highlight where a few of the audience (including Danny who was an Essex thug on day release from his community service) were chosen to star in a few scenes of a film trailer which we were shown after being subjected to a mocked up, pant-filling disaster on a subway train. The worst ride was a terrible advert for their Twister movie staring Helen Hunt and some overly serious idiot whose name escapes me. The mock up of a hurricane was seriously tame and, as a result, I quite fancy living in Hurricane Alley now as it would help us dry our clothes quicker. The sets throughout the place were amazing with mock ups of New York, Maine and San Francisco that were the backdrops to actual movies. It also seemed like there were always characters roaming the streets which was a nice touch. Still, if I die without seeing another 4D movie (3D with glasses and the 4th dimension provided by a moving chair or spraying water…I actually experienced 5D if you include the little shit next to me kicking my leg throughout the film) then I’ll not be too sad.

It had got to early afternoon before we were all done with the Studios Park but our tickets were still valid for the Island of Adventure park next door so we stretched our roller coaster muscles with a final few rides of The Hulk coaster and the Jurassic Park water ride. There was a lady being pulled onto the Hulk coaster by her husband who was clearly absolutely hammered and I was really pleased when they chose the back row as that put me out of vomit range…but I forgot about the 360 degree loops. Luckily she managed to keep the bottle of whiskey inside her throughout the ride but the ornamental lake took some damage as soon as she got off. I didn’t get close enough to hear if they were British but in my heart of hearts I think I know. Some people really shouldn’t be allowed outside their own borders.

Despite having covered easily 5 miles walking around theme parks, we still managed very respectable runs before heading out to dinner. It sounds strange to say this but we both craved the comfort of some chain food so we headed to the world’s biggest Hard Rock Café which comes with a full-size pink Cadillac revolving above the bar. It’s actually a really impressive building that easily holds 500 people (although not in early January when the crowds are so sparse) and the food is exactly what you would expect; call it either upscale fast food or mediocre American dining but it hit the spot nicely.

We’re leaving Orlando prematurely tomorrow morning to head down to meet a couple of friends in Fort Myers for an increasingly rare boozy night. I hope I remember how to get drunk…

Day 70 - The Sunshine State, My Arse.

Author – Grant
Based In – Orlando, (Florida)
Feels Like - Manchester (God's Country)

Today’s Photos - http://www.flickr.com/photos/32017704@N03/sets/72157612485606279/

Given Disney’s power in the Orlando region, I can’t believe they don’t control the weather. Surely Bob Iger has had the foresight to offer Mother Nature a one year unlimited pass to the theme parks for her and her family in return for 365 sunny, rain free days a year. Unless Disney own all the cinemas and indoor mini-golf courses in town as well. The crafty buggers.

Clearly the reason I muse this concept is because Day 70 was windy, rainy and cold. We had planned to visit Epcot but the weather, wanting a day off and being a bit done with outer space themed stuff after overdosing in Cape Canaveral meant that we gave ourselves a theme park free day which is probably a felony for British people in Orlando. Instead, after the obligatory lie-in (cut short somewhere around 9am by a whistling dog with crossed legs and a leash in her mouth) we dusted off the bikes and bashed out 24 miles in world record pace. Unfortunately it’s not the good type of world record; it’s the record for slowest pace ever set. It took us about 2 ½ hours which is only about 50% faster than running. Admittedly those 150 minutes did include ‘convenience’ stops (which, for us, includes both bathroom and bakery visits) as well as getting lost time. Even so, it was pitifully slow and I don’t like to point fingers but it was Kate’s fault as she has the thigh strength of an unborn baby. She considers herself a bit of a bike enthusiast and has even tried to give herself the nickname ‘Spokes’ (hence her user name for this blog) although, to date, she is the only person to refer to herself that way. My theory is that she only likes cycling because it is the only cardiovascular activity that can legitimately be done whilst sitting down.

After a rather fine yet healthy homemade lunch of shrimp, ham and veggie wholewheat pasta, the idea was to hit one of Orlando’s many and magnificent mini-golf courses but it was raining miserably so we just flobbed (if that’s a verb) and spent enough time with our needy dog in order to justify leaving her alone in the evening to hit downtown Orlando.

Google Maps is rapidly becoming my favourite restaurant guide which might sound a bit heathen but typing “Greek restaurants in downtown Orlando” actually results is seven options with a summary of reviews from selected culinary websites all mapped out. And as the websites they choose only take reviews from actual customers, it’s usually pretty accurate. So that’s how we ended up in The Greek Corner and, once again, Google did us proud. Our uber-friendly, scar-faced, super-Greek waiter started us off with a couple of Greek Salads which were good but olively frugal totaling just a single olive per salad. This sort of thing worries me in a restaurant’s opening gambit as I fear that following courses might be equally measurable in Weight Watchers points but luckily my fears were entirely misplaced. Our mixed Meze platter (“small”) was pictured twice – once stand alone and once with a human hand next to it in order to gain some perspective of it’s magnitude. It contained (take a deep breath…) slices of roast lamb, sliced doner meat (such a teenage flashback to unsuccessful nights clubbing ended with comforting kebabs – they never rejected my strong advances), babaganoush, hummus, feta, dolmus, taramasalata, olives (too many, ironically), chicken spanikopita, spinach parcels and some spicy sausage. Now I arrived at this restaurant ravenous but after this mega-starter I was completely stuffed. Unfortunately we ordered mains at the same time as ordering starters so my lemon and oregano lamb chops (all five of them) and Kate’s beef kabob (think skewered elephant’s leg) arrived with lemon and thyme roasted potatoes (excellent). It was a crazy amount of food but it was really good stuff, apart from the mild side taste of petroleum which, presumably, they had used to start the charcoal fire. At the end of the meal Kate and I did a swap. She passed me her ‘on the house’ shot of ouzo and I passed her the car keys. You should have seen the horrified look on Kate’s face when I ordered some Baklava (my all time favourite dessert) to go…it was nearly as harsh as the look on my face when she shnarfed waaay more than half of the said dessert before I had chance to get at it.

Universal Studios tomorrow – Shrek me up, Shrek me up my little buttercup.

Day 69 - SchmaltzWorld

Author – Kate
Based In – Orlando (Florida)
Specifically – Sea World

Today Photo’s - http://www.flickr.com/photos/32017704@N03/sets/72157612533926996/

One thing I knew for sure that I wanted to see in Orlando was Seaworld. I wasn’t actually sure what it was but I knew I wanted to see it so whoever does their marketing is good.

The day started with something called “Clyde & Seamore Take Pirate Island”. It was a 30 minute skit involving 3 people, a walrus, an otter and 2 sea lions. The sea lions were the best actors followed by the walrus but it was very entertaining. On the way out of the show we realized that at no point had anyone tried to tell us anything about any of the animals but it was all good mindless fun.

Next stop was Shamu stadium for the killer whale show called “Believe”. The shows name should have been a good hint but we didn’t realize how schmaltzy this was going to get. It started with a speech about the military and having anyone in the audience who was in the army stand while we applauded – not seeing the link to killer whales but ok. Next came a video about a little boy who falls in love with whales followed by the now grown up boy jumping out from behind the screen to show how dreams can come true as he is a Seaworld whale trainer. The little boy in the video is carving a whale tail necklace and the grown man says he wears it every day as a reminder that dreams come true but then later in the show he gives the necklace to a little girl in the audience to help her pursue a dream to become a vet – veterinarian rather than war veteran Im guessing but then perhaps Im wrong as that could explain the military link. It turns out that we can all buy our own dream necklace too in the Seaworld store for $9.99, how nice. The finale of the show starts with the whole audience doing the Shamu dance and chanting Shamu Shamu. Don’t get me wrong Shamu is massive and the jumps were pretty impressive which made for good photo ops but I was ready to leave as they started to give their last “the world is great” speech.

The dolphin show was less preaching but definitely a bit odd. There are trapeze artists dressed as parrots, high divers and some kind of dream scene sequence that ends when a little girl gets a hunky guy but the dolphins when they were involved were pretty spectacular and Grants photos are cool.

For the thrill seekers there is a rollercoaster called Kraken that’s good and as it was pretty quiet it felt like we had our own rollercoaster for the day. But the real highlight is the Pets Ahoy show. Here “Cats, dogs, birds and even a pig perform high action feats”. It was really funny and generally the dogs (all from a local rescue centre) seem happy but there was a cat on a high wire that just looked petrified. Still we’ll probably try to teach Molly some of the tricks.

Entertainment that night was a run for Grant followed by the gym for me about an hour later as I felt guilty and a really tasty pork tenderloin salad for us both. Tomorrow a bike ride and min golf.

Day 68 - Universal Appeal

Author – Grant
Based In – Orlando, Florida
Specifically – Universal Island Adventure Theme Park
Miles Ridden On Coasters – Hundreds
Dry Heaves – Several

Today’s Photos - http://www.flickr.com/photos/32017704@N03/sets/72157612406560801/

If yesterday was a day of being old, today was to be the complete opposite. Fast forward to the end of the day and I had regressed enough to bring my hair clippers out of retirement and give myself a young, bald look once again.

I’ll be completely honest and admit that I had no clue that Orlando has enough theme parks to keep even the most avid thrill-seeker busy for at least two weeks. As we have given ourselves just four days here, that means we had some decisions to make. Disney has four theme parks, Universal has a couple and then there seems to be endless other independent offerings like Sea World so how to choose, how to choose? Like so many of life’s important decisions, it’s best to treat it like a game of Guess Who. First criteria, cross off any parks that look educational – we’re not hear to learn…we’re here to get legally dizzy. Secondly, cross off any theme parks that are “dry”. We went to Disneyland in Hong Kong (I know, I know…look at us…aren’t we hateably well traveled) and they didn’t sell beer. The result was a theme park was filled with stunned Englishmen wandering round in sober daze, if there is such a thing. Third, distance from my bed. Never underestimate the power of laziness (surely that’s a paradox?) and, incredibly, our $59 a night hotel is on the doorsteps of both of the Universal parks. Decision made – Universal it is.

Now I can’t imagine much is less interesting to read about than someone else’s adventure in a theme park so let’s just summarize the day as fantastic. We had multiple goes on the best rides we found and luckily never stood in line for more than 15 minutes. My favourite, for it’s sheer innovation was the Spiderman ride that was a 3D roller coaster affair that literally left me stunned with admiration. There were multiple awesome coasters including The Hulk where you spend as much time upside-down as upright and The Duelling Dragons which is a race between two coasters that you hang down from rather than sit in…if you get my drift. There are a couple of wet rides. Actually, scratch that. There are couple of drowning rides. One ride includes a near vertical 85 foot drop but it’s the log flume that does the real damage. Not only are the various splashes at the bottom of the slopes of near tidal-wave proportions but there is also the sadistic option for spectators of the ride to pay a quarter which puts them in charge of a water-jet strategically aimed at the heads of riders. We only found this feature after we had ridden but it did explain why there was a woman stood on a bridge apologizing to us as we swallowed our fourth gallon of water towards the end of the ride. Still, I got the last laugh as I found her car and cut the brakes. I may take a photo of her as she piles into a lamp-post and charge her $14.99 for it.

Quite frankly I was mucho pleased that we’d planned a night in as we were both a bit knackered from a day of such excitement in the sun. Oh dear, that’s back to being old isn’t it? Dinner was a wee bit experimental as I cooked a mixture of vegetables in a curried coconut broth and topped it with a slab of pan fried salmon and cilantro. It sounded tasty in my head but in reality the broth was a bit sweet thanks to too much coconut cream. Still, the fish was tops (if I do say so myself) with crispier skin than a leper with sun burn and super juicy flesh. Lovely.

Now I’d love to stay and chat but Bad Girls is on and Amber just nearly got bitch-slapped by Aiela. Sea World tomorrow – another damp day is in the offing.

Day 67 - It's Official, We Are Old

Author - Grant
From – Titusville (Florida)
To – Orlando (Florida)
Miles Driven - 39

Today’s Photos – http://www.flickr.com/photos/32017704@N03/sets/72157612448887824/

Day 67 is best summarized by a series of incidents that prove that we are officially old people.

1) Breakfast was NOT at the IHOP which is attached to our hotel. Two days in a row just seemed excessive and we are at the age where one must consider one’s cholesterol. Furthermore, I am not far off my much anticipated “middle aged spread” and I would like to be able to recognize when it happens.

2) Our tickets from yesterday’s Kennedy Space Centre visit were still valid today for The Astronaut Hall of Fame (which is located next door to the Police Hall of Fame…which, frighteningly, has a gun shooting range as one of its attractions) and we were at the museum a full ten minutes before it opened. Young people would have still been nursing a hangover but we were making friends with a 65 year old couple from Montreal who were also in line instead.

3) Inside the museum we neglected to go on one of the rides (all museums contain rides here) because we thought it would make us feel sick. Now that’s not exactly throwing caution to the wind is it? Admittedly we were still feeling the effects of a previous ride which was one of those nasty centrifugal machines where you sit in a little capsule and get whizzed around like wet lettuce leaves up to a frightening 4G. Whilst that isn’t exactly James Bond torture level, it’s still enough to remind you what you had for breakfast.

4) We arrived in Orlando before midday and DID NOT go to a theme park until the following day. I can only suggest that the average length of time between arriving in Orlando and riding a coaster is directly proportional to your mental age. Instead, we had some lunch and then went for a 20 mile bike ride. That’s right, we neglected Mickey and friends in favour of exercise.

5) We are staying in accommodation with a little kitchen (actually it has a single working electric hob/ring and a microwave) and so we went shopping for a week’s worth of food. Whilst this decision to commit to eating in our hotel room whilst on holiday/vacation in Florida may seem weird (and, of course, old), it makes sense to us as we’re leaving Molly alone all day so she needs company and, as a bonus, it saves money. What makes us incredibly old, however, is our decision to buy and make packed lunches for the days we’re visiting theme parks. Yep, we now have a fridge full of meals packable into Tuppaware boxes. We are going to look more like “hip replacement” than “hip”.

6) This doesn’t specifically relate to today but I am currently growing my hair out, partly because I don’t think the shaved head look is sustainable and it is time to sport something more inkeeping with my age. The downside is that I currently look like a microphone that is morphing into a motorcycle helmet. Most worrying is that it seems my nose wants to join in the party.

7) We were in bed by 10:30pm in anticipation of a long day at Universal Island Adventure World tomorrow. I have already made and bagged up tomorrow’s packed lunch and set aside some serious reading in anticipation of the queues for the rides (Time magazine’s Review of 2008) but I still need to lay out a comfy pair of shoes for all that walking about. Now where did I leave that pack of Werthers Originals?

Day 66 - It's Not Rocket Science...Erm, Actually

Author - Kate
From – Titusville (Fl)
To – Titusville (Fl)
Via – NASA Cape Canaveral
Miles Driven - 30

Today’s Photos – http://www.flickr.com/photos/32017704@N03/sets/72157612448753446/

A branch of the IHOP chain (International House of Pancakes) is attached to our current motel so it was basically laziness & greed that led us there for breaky today. Grant can always be relied upon to try the house classic and so had pancakes, impressively he resisted the unlimited pancakes option – I guess he was still sleepy. I had the poached eggs which turned out to be the lardiest option of the two but we were going to need our energy for a visit to see the site of 124 launches into space, Kennedy Space Station at Cape Canaveral.

On the drive up to the Visitor Centre the first thing you see is a garden of old (real) space rockets, the second thing you see is the dummy of a fully suited astronaut on the ceiling. That was pretty much all I was hoping/expecting to see today so anything extra was going to be a plus.

We had heard there was a ride so we headed to the Launch simulator designed by astronauts themselves. There was smoke, a vibrating floor and a pretty amusing video with people recounting their thoughts during their first take off and that was just the introduction. The actual ride shakes you around a lot and is pretty fun, thankfully you don’t have to sit upside down for 3 hours which is what the real folks have to do on genuine launches. Grant often reminds me that most of my blogs sound like a 5th grader writing a school report “first we blah blahed and then we blah blah and then and then” but I don’t like to leave anything out so I’m just going to list some of the stuff you can see; moon rock, space suits, the different mission control rooms, monuments and there is even an option to have lunch with an astronaut.

After all of that there is a bus tour that takes you to see some of the NASA sites on Merrit Island. As well as NASA the island is home to a wildlife sanctuary so along with spaceeeee sites you see alligators (we saw about 8), Armadillos, Herens, Eagles and a bunch of other pretty amazing looking birds. The buses are pretty essential as everything has to be spread out and for good reason. The fist stop takes you close to the launch pads, apparently on a launch date the sound of the launch alone will kill you if youre within 800 meters. On Weds this week they are moving out the Orbitor to one of the launch pads as the next launch is in early Feb and the rockets/orbitors spend a month on the pads getting prepared. Im pretty gutted we are just missing it but you cant have it all.

The Nasa building where the orbitors get attached to their fuel rockets is huge. We could see the massive building across the miles of water from our run last night and when they explain the scale it makes sense that its visible so far away. The stars on the flag on the side of the building are each six foot wide. You could fit Yankee stadium (which is huge itself) on the roof and still have room for a 1 acre car park. You can tell it’s really big when you are there but there isn’t anything to scale it against as the island is so remote so it helps when they explain that you could also fit 3.5 Empire State buildings inside of the space!

We’d watched the fascinating 3d Imax movie in the morning about the international space station, a cooperation of 14 countries so it was interesting to see equipment being prepared to go up into the station next month and to see a mock ups of the space station itself. It’s also interesting to think that 6 people are in training right now to go up there in a few weeks. We ended our visit with some Space dot ice cream served in a mini space helmet so I feel now that I really know what its like to be a astronaut J

After a quick run that eveving in keeping with the new us we had a big dinner at Sonnys in keeping with the old us. Sonnys is a bbq joint that Grant had noticed was always packed. I had the pulled pork and Grant had the ribs platter and both were great. Sonnys has been a favourite with locals for 40 years and you cant blame them, it also explains why a lot of them are pretty massive.

Tomorrow we are going to the astronaut hall of fame and then onto Orlando. Micky, here we come.

Day 65 - Not Nearly Enough Eating, Running or Eating

Guest Author – Molly
From – A Warm Place (Savannah, Georgia)
To – A Slightly Warmer Place (Titusville, Florida)
Time Spent In Car – Forever

Miles Drive - Nothing I couldn't have ran (276 Miles)
Fights - One minor skirmish but I could have so taken that bitch if I weren't on my lead

Boys Humped – None

Food Eaten - Not Enough

Today’s Photos - http://www.flickr.com/photos/32017704@N03/sets/72157612338684708/

The big oafish looking one that smells of meat and the smaller miserable one that used to have similar coloured hair as my fur don’t let me run around any more so I’m constantly bored. Today is a classic example – after an outstanding breakfast of beef chunks in gravy (without the crunchy bits again…I think they are putting me on a diet which is ironic given the size of them) I was left in the room watching my stories for half an hour when, suspiciously, they came back smelling of peanut butter. Why they don’t feed me more is a mystery. I really do love food you know. Sometime it’s all I think about. My needs are pretty simplistic, I like eating, running around and I’m quite partial to having that bit at the base of my back scratched because it’s about the only spot on my body that I can’t reach myself.

Anyway, all I wanted to do was run around (or eat) but they started packing cases yet again. I’ll admit to being seriously worried that they were going to leave me behind but I got under their feet throughout the packing process so there was no chance they would forget me. We were in the car for five hours today and the one with the hair keeps winning shotgun to the front passenger seat but I’ll take care of her soon, make no mistake of that. They had snacks in the front but, despite creeping forward and rubbing my wet nose on their arms, I couldn’t get their attention to give me any which was weird. About an hour after they got excited at some lame “Welcome to Florida” sign we made a pit-stop. Stopping is good as I get to stretch my legs, pee and there’s always the possibility of food. The place (St Augustine) seemed to have Spanish influence although, being a dog, exactly how I know that is a mystery that my dad is too tired to care about. The fat ones ate wraps whilst all I got was a lousy bowl of water. Again, I’m sure I conveyed my desire to have some of their food but again the message must have gotten lost in translation.

Stop two was in Daytona Beach although we didn’t even get out of the car so I don’t really see the point of the visit. They took some photos of a big raceway stadium (again, the knowledge of what this was surprises me as much as you…along with my newfound ability to type) and drove on without even feeding me.

Once in the new temporary sleeping place, the two-leggers almost immediately left me and came back an hour later sweating profusely. I have a feeling they went running but they didn’t take me which sucks as I think I have mentioned that I love running. And Eating. Speaking of which, dinner was a fantastic bowl of beef with gravy although I could have eaten more. I’m gong to be now as I want to continue a dream I was having earlier – I was running along and then I ate something…it was awesome.

Hopefully tomorrow I’ll be eating and running more. That would be great.